I Want Her Shoes Podcast

Many people treat January as a point of restart. They set goals meant to correct the previous months, especially after holiday routines change eating, sleep, and movement. In this conversation, fitness coach Sandra “Sunny” Njoku explains why those goals often break down and what tends to work better.

Her main point is not that people lack motivation. It is that the goals are often built on the wrong foundation.

Why January Resolutions Often Fail

Sunny describes a common pattern: people set large goals in January to “undo” the holiday period. The goal is framed as a fix. The starting point is guilt.

She argues that this creates a fragile plan. When work shifts, family schedules change, or energy drops, guilt-based goals tend to collapse.

“When you build your goals from the place of punishment, it will certainly fail once life starts to get challenging.”

She also points out that many resolutions are built around surface-level outcomes. In her view, the more durable approach is to start with a personal reason that matters in daily life.

“You have to go really deep and ask yourself a question — why do I need this?”

She adds that the “why” should not be the default answer that sounds good to other people. It should be the reason that changes what you do when things get difficult.

Set Goals From Love, Not Guilt

Sunny’s alternative framing is simple: build goals from care rather than punishment. In practice, that affects how people respond to setbacks.

Instead of stopping after a break in routine, she recommends pausing and resuming. The goal is not to avoid disruption. The goal is to return without turning a setback into an ending.

She also pushes back on the idea that you need a complete identity shift to make progress.

“You don’t need to reinvent yourself from scratch.”

That line connects to a broader theme in the discussion: the work is less about a new version of you and more about consistent actions that fit your current life.

Micro Habits That Compound

A second theme is scale. Sunny argues that many people overestimate what needs to change at once. Her recommendation is to choose small actions that can be repeated and then allow them to compound.

Below are five micro habits she describes.

1) Daily Non-Negotiable Movement

Sunny describes daily movement as a baseline habit. She schedules time to move “with intention,” which can include strength training, stretching, or walking.

Her emphasis is consistency. The form can change, but the practice continues.

In her framing, movement is also a way to create a daily signal that the body needs energy and capacity.

2) The Protein Anchor Method

Sunny describes a simple nutrition question to use throughout the day:

“Where does my protein come from?”

Her reasoning is practical. Protein supports satiety, which can reduce grazing on snack foods. She notes that many parents reach for convenience snacks because they are accessible, especially when managing children’s routines. Her suggestion is not perfection. It is to keep returning to a protein anchor at meals and snacks.

3) Hydration Before Caffeine

Another micro habit is to drink water before coffee. Sunny’s logic is that caffeine can dehydrate, so water comes first. She mentions adding lemon, apple cider vinegar, or chlorophyll to water as options (without detailing exact dosages in the transcript).

The host and Sunny also note that, for many people, the first step is simply drinking more water in general. If plain water is a barrier, Sunny mentions flavored electrolytes as one way to make hydration easier.

4) One Upgrading Rule

Sunny recommends adding one small rule that upgrades a common decision point.

She gives an example related to evening scrolling and suggests asking:

“What would better version of me want at that moment?”

Her point is not to replace all leisure activities. It is to swap one repeated habit for another option you would choose again the next day. She mentions stretching, reading, or choosing something “meaningful,” and emphasizes that it should be small enough to repeat.

5) Recovery Is Where Transformation Happens

Sunny describes sleep and recovery as central, not optional. She ties results to recovery rather than to training volume alone.

“Transformation happens not in the gym, it happens during the recovery period.”

In the conversation, she mentions practical parts of an evening routine: less scrolling, fewer late-night emails, and magnesium in the evening. The details of what that looks like can vary, but the structure is consistent: protect recovery so the next day is easier to execute.

Nutrition Without Trends

On nutrition, Sunny does not frame her approach as a “diet.” She describes it as a structure built around protein, carbohydrates, vegetables, and fats, adjusted to context.

She discusses seasonal differences. In colder climates, she describes craving warm foods and recommends focusing on soups and stews. She frames these as options that feel filling and are easier to sustain in winter routines.

She also mentions a guideline she follows: if dietary fat is higher, she tries to reduce carbohydrates, and she warns against combining high fat and high carb meals. (The transcript does not include a deeper explanation or references for this claim, so it is presented here only as her stated approach.)

What She Eats in a Day (As Described)

Sunny shares an example of her day, while noting she is not presenting it as universal.

• She starts with water, then coffee.
  
• For breakfast, she often has an egg white omelet and focuses on getting protein early.
  
• For lunch, she describes a simple meal: a protein source (e.g., salmon), a carbohydrate (e.g., brown rice), and vegetables (e.g., broccoli or asparagus).
  
• When she is out, she keeps snacks available, such as nuts, trail mix, or a protein shake.
  
• She advises having a protein shake after training and mentions the window of “within 30 minutes” as her guideline.
  

She also discusses protein intake more generally. She gives examples of how protein targets can depend on weight and activity level, and mentions that excessive protein can cause side effects (she shares an example from her own past experience).

Tracking and Biofeedback

Sunny recommends tracking macronutrients for a short period as an awareness tool. Her suggestion is not lifelong tracking. It is a limited window to learn portion sizes and understand what your daily intake looks like.

“Track at least for a month to know.”

She also emphasizes paying attention to how food affects you, rather than copying someone else’s plan.

“How do I feel after certain foods?”

She lists examples of what to notice: energy changes, bloating, or feeling drained. Her point is that generic advice cannot account for individual reactions.

Mindset Over Motivation

Toward the end, the discussion returns to mindset. Sunny’s point is that motivation changes, but a clear reason can carry you through periods where results are slow.

She suggests revisiting why you started and then measuring progress using small metrics that show change over time: energy levels, strength improvements, or capacity increases (she uses push-ups as an example).

She summarizes the core idea in two lines:

“A slow progress doesn’t mean no progress.”

and

“It’s just the consistency over perfection.”

That framing also answers a common barrier: “I only have 15 minutes.” In the conversation, the host emphasizes that short sessions still count if they happen consistently. The timeline may be longer, but the direction can stay steady.

Putting It Into Practice This Week

If you want a simple way to apply the discussion without turning it into an overhaul, you can translate Sunny’s points into a short checklist:

• Choose a reason that is specific and personal, not performative.
  
• Schedule daily movement, even if the type changes.
  
• Use the protein anchor question at meals and snacks.
  
• Drink water before caffeine.
  
• Replace one repeated habit (like scrolling) with one small alternative.
  
• Protect recovery so tomorrow is easier to execute.
  

None of these steps require a January reset. They require repetition, adjustment, and returning after interruptions.

Katie Love describes a career shift from NBC News reporting to running a social media agency. In the episode, she connects that shift to storytelling, personal branding, and building systems that support both business growth and family life.

The conversation starts with how Katie approaches New Year planning. She says she uses a vision board with her team and reviews outcomes from the previous year: “I always do [a vision board] and I work with my team… at the end of last year we end up looking to see what came to fruition.”

She gives one example of the type of goal she put in front of herself: “I had a picture of her cover in Forbes and we got to work with her… it’s just like a power of putting it out into the world.”

She also ties planning to more than business goals: “When we’re thinking about our life, it’s not just work… our kids, our partner.” The host echoes this framing by positioning the episode around leadership, pivoting, and building a business around a personal voice.

The pivot: leaving a high-intensity reporting role

When asked about her pivot, Katie describes a specific work context that pushed her to reevaluate. She says she was covering a missing child and thinking about the life she wanted, while noticing the personal impact of the work: “I was covering a missing child… I had anxiety. I couldn’t sleep.”

She describes the cumulative effect of doing that work daily: “Living and breathing it every day… I needed to make a pivot.” She also highlights that the transition did not require certainty first: “I also did this scared.”

This part of the conversation stays focused on the cost of the environment and the decision to redirect her skills into something else, rather than trying to “push through” the role as it was.

What journalism contributed: storytelling and distribution

Katie does not describe her journalism experience as separate from her later work. She points to one skill in particular: storytelling. She also describes an operational insight she noticed in real time: the speed at which social media can distribute information.

She says: “I saw the power of when a child would go missing… how quickly the internet could find a child.” For her, the question became how to use the same tool in a different context: “How do I harness this incredible tool, but to do it in a way that lights up my cup?”

In her framing, the pivot was not a rejection of media. It was a move from reporting to applying storytelling and distribution to business and branding.

Building recognition through personal branding

Katie connects her business development to how she presented herself. She contrasts her earlier role—where she felt she had limited room for personality—with a choice to build a more distinct public identity.

She describes an early decision: “The first thing I did… I dyed the end of my hair… pink.” She links that kind of visible choice to how people remembered her and her work. She recalls a moment that signaled her branding was becoming recognizable: “A woman… was just like, ‘Oh my god, the pink girl.’… ‘My branding is working.’”

Katie explains that this recognition did not depend on people memorizing her company name: “It became sort of my identity… my superhero outfit.” She also situates this as part of how she started the agency: “I started with nothing, no funding, no help.”

In the episode, the “pink” and “sparkly” choices are not presented as aesthetic preferences only. She frames them as signals that helped her show up consistently and be identifiable in business contexts.

Hiring and responsibility: the operational weight of growth

The conversation shifts from personal branding to operations. The host points to the difficulty of early hiring, and Katie agrees. She summarizes the moment as a major step: “Starting a business was like hire one.”

Katie explains why the first hires felt high-stakes. She ties it to responsibility for other people’s stability: “You’re taking on their livelihood, their healthcare, their 401k…”

She also describes the meaning of that responsibility in her business today: “Knowing that I’m responsible for 20 women in their careers…” The discussion here is practical: hiring requires confidence in revenue, but also a willingness to carry obligations that extend beyond the founder.

Showing up online: routine, analysis, and less perfection

A recurring theme is visibility. Katie says many women come to her with hesitations about being seen on camera: “They’re afraid to get on camera.” She argues that showing up over time is what creates leverage later.

She describes how her visibility built a base of support that later affected hiring and client growth: “I created a community of people that had watched me have two children… scale… from nothing.”

Later, when the host asks for advice for women who fear judgment or failure online, Katie suggests starting with posting for oneself and delaying the focus on external reaction: “Post something for you… and then forget about the reaction for a little bit.”

She also addresses perfection as a blocker: “It does not need to be perfect.” Her recommendation is to commit to a schedule and learn through feedback: “Just showing up, getting into a routine, that’s where the real power is.”

In the same section, the host mentions a LinkedIn accountability group where members commit to posting multiple times per week. The point is not scale; it is structure and follow-through.

Authenticity and audience value (including a celebrity example)

Katie describes “authenticity” less as a slogan and more as a method: share lessons from lived experience, connect that to a defined audience, and build from there.

When the host asks how she balances brand presence with authenticity, Katie references working with Naomi Watts. She describes Watts using personal experiences to communicate about perimenopause: “Naomi Watts… took her… storytelling around going into perimenopause… in her 30s.”

Katie says her team worked on the launch: “We had the pleasure of working with her on the launch of her Stripes menopause brand…” In her telling, the core mechanism was openness about a real experience and the audience response that followed.

She summarizes the broader takeaway: “All of us have something… that we can share… lessons you have learned.” Her framing suggests that content ideas do not need to be invented from scratch; they can start from experience and translation into something useful for others.

Misconceptions: “passive income,” influencer work, and what it takes to sustain it

The host raises the idea that entrepreneurs are sometimes treated as a new type of influencer. Katie responds by pushing back on the assumption that influencing is easy or passive.

She describes creator work as labor-intensive: “They are putting work in… the filming, the editing, the building, the concept.” She argues that sustainable visibility requires clarity of message and ongoing execution, not just the decision to participate.

She also describes entrepreneurship as requiring both execution modes—creative and operational: “You need to look at your numbers, but you also need to be creative…” In her case, she hired support to cover weaknesses: “I went out and hired someone… better at… spreadsheets and the organizing…”

Support systems, comparison, and choosing “the room”

A practical thread in the episode is support. When asked how she runs a company while being a mom and wife, Katie says the baseline requirement is help: “You can’t do everything without support… your village, your community.”

She describes a household structure where her husband is the stay-at-home parent: “My husband… is a stay-at-home parent…” She also describes his approach as enabling her decisions rather than limiting them.

She adds a second support layer: her team. She credits them with contributing ideas and execution that made growth possible.

At the same time, she talks about a risk that increases with visibility: comparison. She says she is trying to narrow focus and reduce that loop: “I’m trying to… keep my blinders on… not look so much at what everyone else is doing…”

The conversation also addresses gender dynamics in professional spaces. Katie describes repeatedly being the only woman in certain rooms and deciding to change that: “I kept finding myself as being the only woman in the room… I need to change what room I’m in.” She explains the goal as being in environments where she does not need to prove value repeatedly: “I want to be in a room where women get it.”

For her, part of that change was choosing to build a team of women and focusing her work on women founders.

Work-from-home boundaries: time blocks as a shared system

Katie shares one practical system that helped her manage working from home with a child. She describes the challenge of being physically present but unavailable during work hours, and the need to make availability predictable.

She outlines a schedule she used with her daughter: “From 9:00 a.m. to 12:00, mommy was an entrepreneur… From 12:00 to 12:30, mommy was going to be mommy.” She says the structure helped because her daughter could anticipate when she would get attention and when she would not.

She notes that boundary-building took time: “Creating those boundaries was helpful, but it wasn’t easy at the beginning.”

Outsourcing and “zone of genius”

In a later section, Katie frames outsourcing as a way to reduce bottlenecks and anxiety. She suggests that if social media execution creates stress, founders can delegate parts of it so they stay focused on the work they do best.

She puts it directly: “Deciding what to outsource can be such a liberation.” And she ties it to focus: “You want to be in your zone of genius.” She uses accounting as an example of what she decided not to keep doing herself.

The host adds a related point: once revenue supports it, outsourcing work you do not want to do can free time for higher-value activities.

Style as a conversation tool: the “sparkly sneaker” segment

The episode ends with a conversation about shoes as identity and social signal. Katie shows sparkly Betsy Johnson sneakers and describes how they became a way of showing up in rooms.

She frames the shift from trying to match traditional expectations to embracing what fits her: “Katie, you are a sparkly sneaker… let’s show up this way.” She also notes that the shoes often start conversations: “It has become a conversation piece when I walk into a room…”

The host ties this to her own history in tech, describing shoes as a prompt for conversations that led to opportunities, including introductions connected to her first business acquisition.

Closing: what the episode emphasizes

Across the conversation, Katie’s points repeatedly return to a small set of mechanisms:

• Transferable skill: storytelling applied outside journalism
  
• Visibility strategy: routine and analysis rather than perfection
  
• Growth structure: support systems at work and home
  
• Environment design: choose rooms where the dynamics match how you want to operate
  
• Execution relief: outsource work that pulls focus away from core strengths
  

The episode closes with a New Year tone, but the operational focus stays consistent: systems, repetition, and clarity about audience and message.

Emily Dempsey describes a career path that moves across fashion buying, creator monetization, commercial real estate, and Bitcoin education. In the conversation, she explains why she changed directions, how she built a women’s community in Miami, and how she thinks about the practical side of Bitcoin and mining. She also shares routines she uses to manage momentum during transitions.

Early career foundation: fashion, economics, and buying

Dempsey says she grew up near Chicago and wanted a different path than the one she saw around her: “I grew up in Chicago and a small town where everybody… you live the same rinse and repeat life. And I really wanted to do something different.”

She studied economics, but she pursued fashion intentionally and focused on getting experience across the industry. She describes taking internships across multiple functions before moving toward buying. She mentions early roles at Barney’s and then Bergdorf Goodman, which she frames as a high-learning environment with demanding hours.

That early period also shaped how she thinks about skills that travel between industries. She describes being comfortable with numbers and analytics inside a creative field—useful, but not always aligned with the work she wanted to be doing.

Why she left corporate fashion

Dempsey describes leaving fashion not as a rejection of the industry, but as a shift in incentives and control. She says she looked at leadership above her and did not want that path: “I started kind of looking around the corporate environment and I’m like, I don’t really want to be my boss.”

She also describes the income ceiling she saw in corporate roles: “I started realizing that there was such a cap on the amount of income that I was ever going to make working in corporate.” She connects that to ownership and long-term motivation: “I also didn’t love that I was building something for somebody else.”

A more immediate driver was role drift. She says she was pulled toward analytics because she was good at it: “You’re actually really good at Excel and spreadsheets and numbers… You’re going to focus on that.” For her, that created distance from the creative work she expected to do in buying.

First entrepreneurship experiment: “Detox to Rettox”

Dempsey’s first step into entrepreneurship came through an Instagram account she built around health and fitness. She describes it as an early entry point into making independent income: “I started a health and fitness Instagram account called Detox to Redtox… that was like my real first kind of journey into entrepreneurship.”

She says she learned monetization by talking with friends who were already operating in creator and brand ecosystems. In her framing, the work was practical: learn the mechanics, test what works, and move fast enough to create revenue.

Pandemic recalibration and the bridge into commercial real estate

She describes the pandemic as a forcing function. She says it changed the timing for business school and altered where she wanted to live. After that period, she worked in fashion-tech startups and then moved into commercial real estate brokerage, focusing on retail leasing.

She explains the move as less disconnected than it might appear. She links retail leasing to the logic of merchandising and positioning: arranging storefronts in a center and arranging product on a floor require similar thinking. She also notes overlap in relationships built through earlier work.

Building Bickl Babes: from a local gap to a scalable community

Dempsey says she moved to Miami in early 2022 and noticed the absence of the professional women’s network she had in New York. “I don’t have the same girl group that I had in New York… and I’m struggling to find that in Miami.”

She describes joining existing local Facebook groups and finding them unwelcoming: “They were very anti-transplant, very anti-New York, and some of them very anti-women.” When she asked for resources, she says the responses could be hostile. Her response was to build an alternative rather than push for acceptance inside existing structures: “I’m not one to sit around and complain. I’m like very much I’m going to fix this.”

She created a new Facebook group positioned as a safe space for women looking for resources and peer connection. She says it grew quickly at the start, and soon the group moved into offline gatherings.

She describes the first event as a small test that turned into proof of demand: “I make reservation for four people… thinking nobody’s going to show up… we end up having over 35 girls show up.” From that moment, she says the community expanded across platforms: “We’re actually now at 60,000 people across all of our platforms.”

In her account, the product of the community is not only content but logistics: local recommendations, in-person programming, and a recurring schedule of events.

Why in-person community matters in an online environment

Both the host and Dempsey connect the rise of community to limits in online trust and connection. Dempsey frames in-person engagement as a core component, not a side channel: “The in-person aspect of it is so important.”

She describes Bickl Babes as having a large digital presence while relying on offline events to create trust and continuity. She also notes that people want local information, and that the community’s programming expanded into professional and personal development content.

Entering Bitcoin: family exposure and a forced first transaction

Dempsey says her exposure to Bitcoin began through her father, who followed it early through trading research and market pattern signals. Her first direct experience, however, was not an investment thesis. It was a utility moment tied to a security incident.

She says her Instagram account was hacked and held for payment: “The only way I was going to get the Instagram account back was if I sent this stranger on the internet $500 in Bitcoin.” She says she paid and regained access, then stepped away for a period.

Later, she began learning again and increased her engagement after moving to Miami, which she describes as a place where crypto activity and education were accessible.

How she explains Bitcoin’s infrastructure role

Dempsey separates the “asset” conversation from the “system” conversation. She emphasizes blockchain as underlying rails for moving value across locations: “Bitcoin is a blockchain technology… the guard rails to move money…” In her framing, this is about understanding how digital systems operate, not only about trading.

Bitcoin mining, explained in operational terms

Dempsey connects mining to both technology and real estate, particularly energy sourcing and location decisions. She describes the mining operation in a simple definition: “Essentially a Bitcoin mine is a data center.”

She then explains why energy cost matters: “You need as much power as you can to guess a sequence of numbers… if you guess the correct sequence… you unlock a block.”

She distinguishes between on-grid and off-grid approaches. On-grid is tied to proximity to a power plant and negotiated rates. Off-grid is tied to sourcing energy directly from specific sources. She uses examples to show the range of inputs: “There’s people using cow manure to mine Bitcoin.” The point, in her explanation, is consistent: the economics depend on accessing low-cost energy and converting it into compute.

Style and personal brand across career changes

Dempsey argues that style influences confidence and how a person enters a room: “I think the way that you dress makes you feel a certain way about yourself.” She says this is part of why she entered fashion and why style remains part of her community’s programming, including sessions like color analysis.

She also describes how she reworked her personal presentation as her career changed, including a shift when she entered commercial real estate: “I literally had to do a whole rebrand of myself when I went into commercial real estate…” She describes her current positioning as balancing femininity with being taken seriously in a space where she sees fewer women.

Impostor syndrome and a tracking system for progress

Dempsey says repeated pivots can create doubt even when skills transfer: “In full transparency I struggle with impostor syndrome… pivoting careers…” To counter that, she uses a simple tracking system: “I have a note in my phone and I call it my manifestation evidence log.”

She describes the habit as recording wins and meaningful moments and using it as a review tool during low-confidence periods: “Whenever I’m feeling like down… I can go back and scroll and I’m like, I did so much this year.”

This is presented as a practical routine rather than a mindset shift. The goal is evidence, stored in one place, reviewed when needed.

Giving back through Lotus House

Dempsey says Bickl Babes partners with Lotus House in Miami and organizes recurring volunteer activity and donation drives. She describes a quarterly cadence for volunteer days, clothing swap and clothing drive logistics, and ambassadors teaching financial literacy and entrepreneurship to residents. [The transcript does not specify outcomes or measured impact.]

What’s next: “Stacked” and an education platform approach

Dempsey describes plans for a podcast called “Stacked,” tied to a conference of the same name. She frames it as an education path that starts broader than Bitcoin-only content, with categories that include financial literacy and entrepreneurship, Bitcoin/digital assets, and wellness. [The transcript does not specify a launch date or distribution plan.]

Closing advice: talk to people and start

Dempsey’s advice for women building something centers on volume of conversations and reducing hesitation: “Talk to as many people as possible. Network, network, network.” She follows that with execution guidance: “Don’t be shy. Just start.”

Her story in the episode supports that sequence: identify the gap, create a simple first version (a group, an event, a learning project), and iterate based on real demand.

Samantha Brown’s work spans celebrity styling, personal styling, and directing fashion videos for runway shows. She started her business in New York with closet clean-outs and clothing consignment, then moved deeper into styling through years of fashion-industry work. Her approach is practical: style decisions are not only about what is owned, but about what is worn, why it is worn, and how it supports daily life.

From closet clean-outs to styling work

Brown launched her business in New York as a clothing consignment service. The work required going through closets item by item, selling what clients no longer wanted, and helping them shop with more intent. That process became an entry point into styling.

Her early fashion experience also shaped the direction. She worked New York Fashion Week as a teenager, and later gained experience through internships and fashion roles. At one point, she tried design work and learned it was not the path she wanted. The reason was not a lack of interest in clothing, but a preference for building looks rather than constructing garments.

“I wanted to just play with the clothes.”

That preference became the base of her career: selecting, combining, and editing clothing in ways that match the person wearing it.

Style is not the clothes

Brown’s core idea is direct: style is not defined by labels or categories. It is defined by the wearer’s experience and behavior in the clothing.

“Style has nothing to do with the clothes.”

In her framing, clothes are tools. The outcome is how someone moves through the day: whether they feel at ease, whether they communicate presence, and whether they act differently when they feel comfortable in what they wear. She links clothing comfort and personal confidence to practical results—how someone enters a meeting, holds a conversation, or handles a social setting.

This is also why she emphasizes communication when styling. She credits mentor Stacy London with giving her language for decisions that might otherwise remain instinctive.

“There really is a science to styling in addition to the art.”

The point is not only to choose clothing, but to explain choices so clients can repeat the thinking without external help.

Three common closet problems

Many people describe their challenge as “nothing to wear.” Brown often sees the opposite problem: too many items, but little clarity.

“You have nothing to wear. There’s too much to wear.”

She describes several patterns that keep people stuck.

1) Repeating the same small set of outfits

People often rely on a small group of familiar items, even when the closet contains more options.

“You wear 10 things.”

When the same pieces are worn repeatedly without variation, the rest of the closet becomes background. Over time, the wearer stops seeing the range of what they own and how it could be combined differently.

2) Buying more instead of using what is already there

Brown points to impulse buying and accumulation—often driven by sales, convenience, and the idea that a new purchase will fix the “nothing to wear” feeling. She also notes the pressure some people feel about outfit repetition because of social media.

Her alternative is not strict minimalism. It is selective repetition that is deliberate and consistent.

“The best way to develop a signature style is in repetition, but thought-filled repetition.”

In practice, that means rewearing key pieces, changing how they are styled, and letting the repetition build recognition rather than boredom.

3) Keeping items for past versions of yourself

Another common issue is holding onto clothing that represents a previous life stage, body, location, or role. The item becomes a stand-in for identity rather than a working part of the wardrobe.

Brown uses a test to make the decision more concrete.

“If we were shopping today and I presented this, would you buy it?”

If the answer is no, she suggests keeping the memory without keeping the item.

Editing a closet as a reality check

Closet editing, in Brown’s approach, is not only sorting clothes. It is a review of habits and choices: what gets worn, what does not, and why.

She emphasizes dressing for the present rather than an older baseline.

“Dress the body we have today.”

That principle applies to body changes, career changes, relocation, and parenting—any shift that makes old clothes feel less aligned with current life. The goal is to reduce friction: fewer items that do not fit, fewer items that require negotiation, and fewer items that stay unused for long periods.

For people who avoid the process because decisions feel overwhelming, she suggests a simple tracking method: after wearing something, flip the hanger so the direction shows it has been used. Over a few months, the unused section becomes visible, and the question becomes clearer: is it unused because it is for a rare occasion, or unused because it no longer fits the person’s life?

Using style as a professional tool

Brown’s advice for professional settings is consistent with her overall point: show up with intention, even when the setting is informal or remote.

“Get dressed every day.”

She connects daily getting dressed to how someone works, not only how they look. The act of preparing can change focus and behavior.

For people who work on video calls, she notes that the frame is limited. That makes small choices more useful: a consistent piece of jewelry, a lipstick choice, or another identifiable element that reads on camera. Her broader recommendation is to develop a signature that feels accurate rather than performative.

She also advises people stepping into larger roles to study context before changing it.

“Know who you’re going in to see every day.”

Her questions are practical: who are the peers, what are the norms, what is expected, and what signals competence in that environment. Once someone is established, they may have more room to shift expectations.

Confidence and clothing for children

Brown’s children’s book emerged after she became a mother and felt a gap between her work identity and her parenting identity. The book was a way to connect those worlds and bring her child into the meaning of what she does.

“When you feel your best, you can do anything.”

The message is not about dressing children to meet adult standards. It is about allowing children to experiment, choose, and notice how clothing can affect confidence and willingness to try things.

Function and joy as separate reasons to buy

Brown separates purchases into two categories. One is function: items that do consistent work across many settings, such as a reliable blazer. The other is joy: items that may not match a practical need but still have a role in personal style.

“There’s function… and then there’s joy.”

This distinction is also a way to reduce regret. If a purchase is meant to be functional, it should earn its place through repeated use. If it is meant to be joy, the buyer can treat it as such—without pretending it needs to match every part of the wardrobe.

Closing: clarity before more clothes

Brown’s ideas return to a few repeatable actions: edit what is already owned, wear more of it with intent, and align the closet with current life. The result she describes is not a new persona, but fewer daily decisions that feel confusing and more outfits that support the way someone needs to show up.

The throughline is consistent: clothing is not the point. The point is the person wearing it, and what becomes easier when the wardrobe is clear enough to use.

Holiday events can create a familiar problem: too many choices, or no clear idea what works for the setting. In this episode, stylist and entrepreneur Ella Muradyan frames holiday dressing around a few practical rules—use festive elements with restraint, dress for the room you’re walking into, and keep comfort and fit as non-negotiables.

Festive, not excessive

Ella’s baseline recommendation for holiday dressing is to use one statement element and keep the rest simple. Sequins are on the list, but not as an all-over approach.

“Sequins. So, but not again, not head to toe, right? Like cuz you don’t want to look like a lit up Christmas tree.”

Her repeated point is that the “holiday” signal can come from one item. She suggests pairing sparkle with more standard pieces—a white button-down shirt, a skirt, or even jeans—so the outfit reads intentional rather than themed.

Velvet comes up as another option that people hesitate to wear. Ella’s answer is direct:

“Don’t be. Velvet is beautiful.”

If you want one velvet piece, she recommends choosing it as the central item, such as a velvet dress, and letting the rest of the outfit support it rather than compete with it.

Dressing for the occasion

Work holiday cocktail event

For an office holiday event that is still workplace-adjacent, Ella’s suggestions stay within familiar categories: a simple red dress, a blazer that can shift the look from office to after-hours, or a suit.

“Get a nice red dress. A simple red dress that you can also wear at another date, you know, like you can put a black blazer on top of it for work. Uh take take the blazer out. Now you look festive.”

She also describes seeing a red suit at a work event and how the impact came from clarity and structure rather than novelty.

“She walked in with a beautiful red suit and I I still have that image and I’m like I need to find a perfect red suit and it looked amazing.”

Other workable options she mentions include a green skirt with a black top and black stockings, with accessories doing some of the “holiday” work.

“Pair it up with a couple nice shiny earrings. You’ll look festive without trying too hard.”

On what not to do, the boundary is simple: it’s still the office.

“Don’t show up in a mini and an office party. Like, that’s just it’s still an office party.”

She also flags “underwear” style dresses as a bad choice for this setting, and puts ugly Christmas sweaters into the “only if the theme demands it” category.

Work event where families are present

For a work event that includes partners, children, or a more formal mixed group, Ella leans toward a classic base with a single festive detail.

“I would probably wear something black because, you know, it’s classy. I would have, you know, sparkly earrings or a shiny clutch or something.”

The goal is to look put together without treating it like a costume event.

“Something that says I’m still the boss, but I’m also a little laidback. Like nothing too crazy.”

Family dinner: host vs. guest

For family dinners, the decision point is whether you are hosting or attending. If you are hosting, she suggests a combination that allows movement and comfort.

“If I’m the host, I’m probably wearing like one of those silk uh slip-on skirts with a sweater or something.”

If you’re attending, she describes a similar formula: a cashmere sweater, a belt, earrings—items that read intentional but don’t restrict you while eating, sitting, and helping.

She states the underlying rule plainly:

“At the end of the day, you have to be comfortable. If you’re uncomfortable, then you’re not going to have fun.”

New Year’s party

For New Year’s Eve, Ella loosens the restraint and leans into shine.

“Shiny. Shiny disco. Shiny.”

Feathers and more dramatic elements are positioned as appropriate for the event. The conversation also touches on a family tradition of dressing in the horoscope “color of the year,” using the color choice as a theme for what people wear.

What to stop wearing

Ella’s “don’t” list focuses on items that read too casual or too gym-coded for parties.

Athleisure onesies are at the top:

“We don’t wear onesies.”

She clarifies she means the tight athleisure versions styled with blazers, and she treats them as a hard no for holiday parties.

Ripped jeans also get a narrow use case:

“Ripped jeans shouldn’t be worn unless you’re going apple picking or something cute like in the ranch you’re doing something right.”

And she summarizes the broader category rule:

“I think anything athleisure should be at the gym.”

Closet reset before the holidays

A major part of the discussion is not shopping—it’s editing. Ella describes fit as the fastest way to improve how clothing looks, and sees holding onto clothing that doesn’t fit as wasted closet space.

“Anything that doesn’t fit you should probably get rid of.”

If the problem is fit, she offers two options: tailor it or let it go.

“Or go to the tailor, have it tailored, because if it doesn’t fit you now, it’s probably not going to fit you.”

She also gives a simple time rule for decision-making:

“A year. You got to shed.”

Her approach is not “get rid of everything.” She separates classics from clutter. Items like Chanel suits and staple outerwear are positioned as keepers, while outdated pieces and long-term “maybe someday” items should leave the main closet rotation.

Updating your look without buying new clothes

When budget is limited, Ella returns to accessories and recombination. She suggests starting with what’s already in the closet: a sequin skirt, a white shirt, even a plain t-shirt.

“Accessorize again. I’m sure you have something shiny. I’m sure there is a sequin skirt somewhere.”

She also mentions small swaps that change the feel of a basic shirt—replacing buttons, adding a brooch—and points to headbands as a quick update.

“Headbands are great accessories.”

Statement vs. costume

One of the clearer distinctions Ella makes is between making a statement and looking like you’re wearing an outfit as a concept. Her warning is consistent with her earlier point about sequins:

“Don’t go head to toe sparkly gear…”

Her solution is to keep expression controlled and grounded in fit and comfort.

“Make sure it fits you well make sure you feel comfortable because no matter what you wear if those two are together you’re going to walk in looking great I guarantee.”

Practical details that change the outcome

Bags

For party bags, her guidance is minimalism: bring what you need, and leave the rest.

“You don’t need a huge bag to the party unless What are you shipping? Are you the caterer?”

She names the basics—phone, card, lip product—and suggests planning ahead if you’re coming from work by keeping a small bag inside a larger one.

Winter whites

She rejects the rule about not wearing white after Labor Day.

“Wear white. If you want to wear white, wear white.”

She frames winter white as a standard combination—white jeans, black boots, a cashmere sweater—and mentions Ralph Lauren as a reference point for this look.

Kids

For kids, the brand list is secondary to the same principle that shows up throughout the episode: comfort affects confidence.

“It’s all about how they make you feel, right?”

A simple holiday checklist from the episode

• Use one festive element (sequins, velvet, shine) and keep the rest straightforward.
  
• Match the outfit to the setting, especially for work events.
  
• Remove or tailor anything that doesn’t fit.
  
• If you’re not buying new clothes, change the look with accessories and small swaps.
  
• Choose comfort as a requirement, not a bonus.
  

Ella’s closing idea is consistent across all the segments: the outfit should support you, not distract from the event.

“It only works when you feel like you’re wearing the clothes, not the other way around.”

Some careers develop along clear tracks. Others are shaped by repeated exposure to uncertainty, new systems, and problems that do not come with instructions. In this conversation, Sandra Abi Rashed describes multiple points in her career where she had to build, translate, and lead without a ready model—first in early digital commerce, later in publishing transformation, and now through mentorship work connected to data, AI, and tech.

Building Without a Blueprint

Sandra points to two early roles that influenced how she approaches change. One was at L’Oréal, around the early period of digital commerce. She describes being part of a team launching the first e-commerce website in Canada at a time when digital work inside large organizations was still undefined. Her description is practical: teams were learning in real time, and the work required building processes from scratch rather than applying templates.

As she puts it, “There was no playbook.” In that setting, she says the work could not be done by waiting for direction. “You have to actively seek solutions.”

Later, she moved into publishing in a role that involved digitizing a traditional journalism team. The context changed, but the conditions were familiar: she entered a system she did not know, and there was not a standard method for transforming a print-focused magazine business. She frames these experiences as training in how to operate when certainty is limited. The effect, in her words, was learning to be “comfortable in the uncomfortable.”

The Connector Mindset

Sandra describes herself as a connector, but not as an identity she set out to develop. She traces the label to feedback from someone else. During a call, a manager introduced her by saying her “superpower is connecting people with purpose.” Sandra describes hearing that and recognizing it as something she already did, not something she had consciously chosen.

She connects this tendency to her childhood. Her mother is from the Philippines, and Sandra spent time in a village environment where daily life was organized around community effort—people cooking together, checking on neighbors, and helping each other through routine needs. She describes villages as places where “there’s nothing that you do alone.” In that framing, connecting people is not only social behavior; it is a way of working.

She also describes a feedback loop that reinforces the habit. When she connects two people and later hears that the connection led to an opportunity, she treats that as evidence that the act had practical value.

The Business Translator Between Data and Marketing

A recurring theme in the discussion is the gap between technical teams and business teams. Sandra says she has often worked between those groups and describes herself as a “business translator.”

She explains what she means by that term in concrete terms: she can understand data systems and analytics well enough to interpret them and explain them, even though she is not a data scientist or engineer. At the same time, she can understand business goals and executive needs well enough to communicate those needs back to technical teams.

This is not framed as an attempt to eliminate friction. She calls the tension between marketing and data “a healthy tension,” and argues it should exist. The work, as she describes it, is not to choose sides but to connect the logic, language, and priorities across both.

Leading Through Transformation

Sandra speaks about transformation as a recurring condition rather than a single project. The challenges are not only technical. They show up in how people interpret change, how they react to uncertainty, and how teams align around a shared purpose.

When asked about motivation, she returns to the need for shared reasoning. In her framing, the core question is often: “Why are we doing this?” She describes leaders as needing to do more than assign tasks; they need to help people connect daily work to business growth, personal development, and future changes.

She also makes a point that does not present transformation as universally desirable. Some people will not want to be part of it, and she treats that as a real outcome rather than a failure. “If it’s not for you, then it’s not for you.” She repeats the idea in a way that suggests boundaries: transformation can be necessary for the business, but participation may vary.

Style as Energy and Presence

When the discussion turns to leadership presence, Sandra does not focus on fashion as status. She describes style as a tool for managing energy, tone, and how she shows up in a given context.

She says she chooses what she wears based on the energy she wants to project. “I feel the style is related to the energy.” In her example, color can align with a mood or a setting, and small decisions can support focus in a meeting.

She also describes tactics that are not visible to others. Because much of her work is remote, she sometimes wears heels even when others will not see them. The point is functional: the physical feeling changes how she stands, how she speaks, and how she carries herself. For her, the goal is not performance for its own sake. It is preparation for a situation where tone and presence matter.

Mentoro: Mentorship Built on Coffee Conversations

Sandra and her co-founder launched Mentoro after observing a pattern while working in publishing. They received calls from young professionals asking for coffee meetings—often with editors, fashion directors, and other leaders. These were requests for access, context, and career guidance.

She and her co-founder encouraged their team to say yes, not because every meeting would lead to a measurable outcome, but because of the asymmetry of impact. “You’re going to forget that you had coffee… but they’re going to remember that for the rest of their life.”

The origin story includes a decision point about structure. She describes a period where they explored pitching an app and a growth-driven model. They stepped away from that approach and chose to build a nonprofit instead. Mentoro, as she describes it, remained focused on the original unit of value: coffee conversations between mentors and mentees.

Mentorship in Data, AI, and Tech: Hard Skills and Soft Skills

In discussing the Miami-based cohort focused on data, AI, and tech, Sandra describes what mentees often seek first: hard skills. People ask how to do the work, how to develop analytics capability, and how to enter technical domains.

She argues that mentorship in these fields should also emphasize soft skills. “We need to encourage them to lean into the soft skills also.” She positions communication, adaptability, and human connection as necessary for careers shaped by rapid change.

She also references the skill categories that appear repeatedly in major workforce conversations: “Critical thinking… analytical thinking… adaptable to change.” In her view, these skills are not separate from technical progress; they are part of how people remain effective as tools and roles evolve.

Another theme she emphasizes is exploration. She encourages mentees to stay curious, examine multiple options, and widen their understanding of what roles exist. The idea is not to delay commitment indefinitely, but to avoid narrowing too early without information.

Authenticity Under Pressure

When asked what authenticity means in high-stakes environments, Sandra does not give a complex framework. She defines it directly: “Being true to yourself and true to your values.”

She acknowledges that business life can push people away from that. Metrics, KPIs, and growth targets can dominate attention. Her response is that leaders sometimes need to pause and ask what they actually care about, what feels aligned, and what the right decision is—especially when business objectives pull in a different direction.

This is not presented as rejecting performance measures. It is presented as a reminder that decisions still have a values component, even when the language in the room is operational.

Advice for Women in Leadership: Reduce the Standard of “Perfect”

Asked what advice she would give to women stepping into leadership roles, Sandra focuses on capacity and expectations rather than tactics. Her direct recommendation is: “Be comfortable cutting corners.”

She explains this as being willing to be imperfect in some areas, and not treating that as a personal failure. She talks about giving yourself grace and accepting limits, especially when balancing multiple roles and responsibilities. She also challenges the language of “good enough,” suggesting that it can still represent full commitment even when execution is not flawless across every domain.

Her view is that leadership sustainability depends on making choices about where to focus, rather than attempting to be perfect everywhere at once.

Closing Thought

Across the conversation, Sandra returns to a consistent set of ideas: learn to operate without a playbook, translate across disciplines, treat tension as manageable, and invest in relationships through mentorship. The unit she comes back to most often is simple: one conversation, one connection, one decision. In her work, those units are not symbolic. They are the system.

If her experience suggests a model, it is not a fixed method. It is a practice of building clarity in uncertain environments—and doing it in ways that keep both business demands and personal values in view.